


It's All Good

by casey270



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-22
Updated: 2011-06-22
Packaged: 2017-10-20 15:50:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/214404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casey270/pseuds/casey270
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy likes to say yes</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's All Good

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: i wanted to write a fill for [this prompt](http://glam-kink.livejournal.com/1444.html?thread=1660324#t1660324) on glam_kink. i planned on about 500 words of PWP, but this came out instead. it doesn't quite fill the prompt, but it's close.

Tommy hasn’t ever found much in life that’s worth saying no to. When he was little, he said no to religion because religion said no to too many things. When he was older, he said no to marriage because marriage said no to getting close to other people.

But Tommy always says yes to things that open his life to new experiences. He has no problem saying yes to music. Music brings new people into his life, people who are maybe a little freer, a little more open themselves. Music opens his soul to the universe. He can show the world exactly who he is through the music. He can be confident when he plays his music; he can be larger than life.

Tommy says yes to a little makeup because he likes pretty, no matter who it is or how it comes to be. The makeup opens his life to even more people who are open, and closes it to some people who turn out to be too closed to really be his friends.

Tommy says yes to people who don’t try to fit the traditional roles. Sticking to tradition is just another way of saying no in Tommy’s mind. Tommy knows he doesn’t fit any standard role, so he doesn’t expect others to, either.

Tommy likes to think he would do anything, as long as it’s a yes thing and not a no thing. He wants as much of his life as possible to be a yes, a big fuck you in the face of all the rules that say no you can’t, or thou shalt not.

When Tommy tries out for the band, and they ask if he can play bass, he says he can learn, because that’s more of a yes, and saying he can’t is just another way of saying no. When he talks to Adam, his whole self says yes to his new boss. Adam just feels like a yes person, so Tommy says yes when Adam wants to play rock and roll with him. Tommy says yes to the costumes, yes to the makeup, and yes to the kissing. He’s really, really glad he said yes to the kissing. Whenever Adam kisses him something deep inside, something that feels bigger than anything else in his life, shouts yes so loud that Tommy can’t hear anything else. It took him by surprise the first time. It took his breath away and made his knees buckle in front of the whole fucking world. Tommy thinks he would have either fallen down or floated right up to the ceiling if Adam hadn’t had such a good hold on him. It was the biggest yes of his life up to that point.

But it wouldn’t stay the biggest yes because sometimes it seems like Tommy can’t say no to Adam, no matter what the question is. The more Tommy gets to know him, the more he thinks of Adam as the yes his life needed..

Even offstage, Tommy says yes to Adam. He says yes to Adam whenever Adam needs the answer to be yes. When Adam needs someone to touch, to feel the comfort of another human being, Tommy's there to say yes. It gets lonely on the road; it’s easy to slip into the no of aloneness. Tommy appreciates some personal, quiet time, but not having someone to touch is another way of saying no to humanity. Adam’s a people person in a very personal way. He needs to feel people in his life; he needs to be able to touch them, to know they’re right there with him every step of the way. Adam needs almost constant contact with people he cares about in order to reassure himself that he’s not out there all alone, so Tommy says yes to being Adam’s emotional grounding rod.

When Adam needs someone to share a hug with during the quiet hours on the bus, Tommy says yes without even having to think about it. It feels good to hold someone again, to have someone hold him. They share their strength, their yes, with each other in ways that surprise Tommy. Tommy’s surprised to learn that he loves the feeling of strong arms wrapped around him, of hands bigger than his own rubbing warm circles over his back. Tommy wants to think that he’s giving as much back as he’s getting from the hugs, but he’s not the type to lie to himself. He knows Adam puts everything that he is into a hug when he really means it. Fuck, Adam could be crowned world champion in hugging, and Tommy would tell everyone it was the right decision. Tommy would ask Adam to keep those hugs going forever so he could live in them, but that would be too much like saying no to the rest of his life. So he just makes sure he’s close whenever he senses Adam’s need to hug.

When Adam needs someone to listen to him, Tommy says yes. Adam seems to know that he can tell Tommy anything without having to worry about being judged. Adam has always had wonderfully creative ideas that make everyone else say _But you can’t do that_. Tommy listens to Adam’s ideas, though. He really fucking listens, and, more often than not, together they find a way to make those ideas reality. Tommy’s in love with the idea that Adam’s a dreamer, but a dreamer who’s strong enough to make his dreams come true. Adam’s drive, his refusal to listen to the people who try to rein him in and hold him back, pulls at the yes that lives in Tommy. Tommy likes thinking that their two yeses are stronger than all the noes they hear.

When the pressure gets to be too much, and Adam needs someone to be with him while he cries, Tommy says yes because there’s no way he could say no to Adam at a time like that. Everyone wants a part of Adam, wants to hear his yes for them self. Sometimes it just gets to be too demanding; there’s not enough left for Adam to hold together. Tommy always seems to know when Adam needs him to step in and help gather up all the little pieces and hold him while he puts them back together. Tommy knows Adam’s strong, fucking Superman kinda strong, as far as Tommy’s concerned, but everyone needs someone else to hold them up sometimes, and Tommy really doesn’t mind being that person for Adam. Tommy has no problem with saying yes to holding Adam for as long as Adam needs to be held.

 

When they’re on tour, and both so lonely that it hurts, Tommy says yes to Adam, because Tommy needs it just as much as Adam does. At first Adam just asks for his time, and Tommy’s happy to say yes. They sit and talk and just let everything go. All the tension, all the road weary, all the pressure of trying to be everything to everyone - it all dissipates when they’re together. They can recharge; they can finally breathe again. It’s nice, it’s quiet, and it’s just the two of them saying yes to each other in a way that no one else would ever understand.

 

They tell each other the secret things, the things that they keep buried deep inside. Adam asks Tommy to trust him enough to know he’ll cherish what Tommy shares with him, and Tommy says yes by telling Adam things he’s never told anyone else, things he’s never even told himself. He feels almost fragile when he’s telling Adam about the hidden Tommy, the Tommy he keeps all to himself. He knows Adam won’t let him break, though. Adam takes his fragility and wraps it in so much positivity that Tommy can finally look at the dark places inside of himself and say, _Yes, this is a part of me; this is who I am_. Tommy says yes to learning to love himself then, because that seems to be what Adam’s asking for, and he says yes to loving Adam, too.

But then Tommy can tell that Adam needs more, needs something he won’t ask for, and Tommy says yes without being asked. They start with small touches that go unnoticed by the people who’ve quit questioning their relationship with each other. Tommy’s hand reaches out to brush against Adam as they both hurry to get to where they need to be. Adam whispers in Tommy’s ear, close enough that Tommy can feel the tickle of Adam’s lips brushing his skin. Tommy sits on Adam’s lap even though there’s a perfectly empty chair right next to them. All of it seems so right, so natural, so fucking perfect that Tommy can only think of it as the kind of yes that lights up his world.

When the touches turn into kisses that aren’t for the public, Tommy says yes to that, too. What happens on stage is wild and fun, but what they share in private is different. When it’s in private, just the two of them, it’s more and less at the same time. It’s more honest, and it’s more real, but it’s also more innocent and pure. There's no ulterior motive behind it; they’re not trying to entertain anyone. It is what it is, and it’s a yes they both feel. When it’s private, it doesn’t have to lead to anything else, but it can if they want it to, because Tommy likes saying yes to Adam, and he knows that some part of him is asking the same questions, and Adam is answering yes, too.

When the kisses go beyond just kisses, when it gets to be more of an awakening, an emotional epiphany, Tommy says yes and thank you. He didn’t know that he needed to open himself so completely to someone else in order to understand who he really is. Each time Adam touches him, Tommy hears Adam asking if Tommy knows who he really is now, if he likes what he finds, and Tommy always answers yes. When they lie together afterward, so tangled and entwined with each other that Tommy doesn’t know where he ends and Adam begins, Tommy smiles and tells Adam that the answer will always be yes.

 

When Tommy hears the little voice inside of him telling him it’s time to move on, he really doesn’t know if he wants to listen to it. He’s happy being where he is, but he knows he can’t say no to the rest of his life. He knows that there’re so many new experiences and people out there for both of them to say yes to, and he knows they both need to say yes. Adam must hear Tommy’s inner voice too, because Adam asks him if he’s going to be okay, if it’s enough for him now, and Tommy loves him more than ever when he answers yes.

They both know that when they need each other again, all they have to do is ask. The answer will be yes.


End file.
